Yule Carol Parody Contest

Tis once again that time mateys t'trots out th ol diddy's fer Yule...or bett'r yet, comes up wit new piratey ones aye...that's th ticket...sooo jus t'starts ye all off (so's ye knows ow t'goes bout it) ere be a wee diddy that ol Cap'n Chancy made a few years back now.

Captain Chancy's Comin to Port by Cap’n Chancy
sung t'th tune o Santa Claus is Coming to Town

*blows on his pitch pipe*

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Ye better watch out, ye better not lie
Ye better not shout or shits gonna fly
Captain Chancy's comin to port

He's hirin mates and givin em pails
Hammers, and ropes, and powder, and sails
Captain Chancy's comin to port

He's watchin when yer bilgin
And if it gets too deep
He'll point ye out to Airforcegrrl
Who will plank ye if ye sleep

Soooo

Ye better not shout, ye better not lie
Ye better watch out cause shits gonna fly
Captain Chancy's comin to port

Tis a contest mates...comes up wit th best Piratey'n Xmas Carol parody n a Phantom Sloop ye'll be winn'n!
Runs till December th 21st, prize will be award'd on th 22nd aft'r th gift Exchange.

Cannons Balls (jingle bells theme)

Sailing on the Sea's
In a one masted sloop
to an island we go
Parleying all the way

Greeny on the map
orders given out
Time to hit the tap
engagement time begins

Cannon Balls, Cannon Balls,
Cannons firing all the way
Sinking boats is fun to do
In a one masted sloop today

Cannon Balls, Cannon Balls,
Cannons firing all the way
Sinking boats is fun to do
In a one masted sloop today

12 Days As SO (obviously sung to The 12 Days of Christmas)

On my 1st day as SO my Captain gave to me…
A brand new War Piggy!

On my 2nd day as SO my Captain gave to me…
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

On my 3rd day as SO my Captain gave to me….
Three bilge pails
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

On my 4th day as SO my Captain gave to me…
Four jugs of rum
Three bilge pails
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

On my 5th day as SO my Captain gave to me…
Five worn out charts
Four jugs of rum
Three bilge pails
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

On my 6th day as SO my Captain gave to me…
Six turtles sleeping
Five worn out charts
Four jugs of rum
Three bilge pails
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

On my 7th day as SO my Captain gave to me…
Seven jobbers lazing
Six turtles sleeping
Five worn out charts
Four jugs of rum
Three bilge pails
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

On my 8th day as SO my Captain gave to me…
Eight worthless trinkets
Seven jobbers lazing
Six turtles sleeping
Five worn out charts
Four jugs of rum
Three bilge pails
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

On my 9th day as SO my Captain gave to me…
Nine empty stations
Eight worthless trinkets
Seven jobbers lazing
Six turtles sleeping
Five worn out charts
Four jugs of rum
Three bilge pails
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

On my 10th day as SO my Captain gave to me…
Ten swords a-slashing
Nine empty stations
Eight worthless trinkets
Seven jobbers lazing
Six turtles sleeping
Five worn out charts
Four jugs of rum
Three bilge pails
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

On my 11th day as SO my Captain gave to me…
Eleven greenies whining
Ten swords a-slashing
Nine empty stations
Eight worthless trinkets
Seven jobbers lazing
Six turtles sleeping
Five worn out charts
Four jugs of rum
Three bilge pails
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

On my 12th day as SO my Captain gave to me…
12 cannons firing
Eleven greenies whining
Ten swords a-slashing
Nine empty stations
Eight worthless trinkets
Seven jobbers lazing
Six turtles sleeping
Five worn out charts
Four jugs of rum
Three bilge pails
Two stinky fish
And a brand new War Piggy!

Cuz nothing be saying Christmas time like pillage for loot. And the bestest loot would be pitchers o' Rum


Gods rest ye merry, pirate mates
Let nothing disengage
Drink up the, rum, and savor
All the spices as it ages
To defeat the enemy’s power
Ye need to earn yer wages
Of pitchers of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy
Of pitchers of comfort and joy

In Coral o’er by Meke,
We sailed with our Captain
laid course for treasure
And boomy pillage action
Shoot and fight yon enemy
and board that merchant galleon
For Pitchers of comfort and joy,
Comfort and joy
For Pitchers of comfort and joy

I saw a Gingerbread War Brig come sailing in
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
I saw a Gingerbread War Brig come sailing in
On Christmas Day in the morning.

And who was sailing on the Ginger Brig,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day?
And who was on the Ginger Brig,
On Christmas Day in the morning?

The Loose Cannons, Mad Mutineers and Dark River were there,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
The Night Owls, Teschio e Ossa and Bloody Scoundrels were there,
On Christmas Day in the morning.

O they sailed into the Emerald Archipelago,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
O they sailed into Spring Island harbour,
On Christmas Day in the morning.

And all the bells on Midnight shall ring,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
And all the bells on Midnight shall ring,
On Christmas Day in the morning.

And all the Pirates on Midnight shall yarrr,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
And all the Pirates on Midnight shall yarrr,
On Christmas Day in the morning.

And all the flag mates on Spring shall sing,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
And all the flag mates on Spring shall sing,
On Christmas Day in the morning.
They wished glad tidings to the present mates,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
They wished glad tidings on the absent mates,
On Christmas Day in the morning

Then let us all rejoice again,
On Christmas Day, on Christmas Day;
Then let us all rejoice again,
For our Otherworld Flag in the morning.